Between the father-daughter dance and the mother-son Dance, the mother-of-the-bride can feel a little left out on her daughter’s big day.
You want to make all your family members feel special on your wedding day, but it’s usually your mom who has put in some extra work during your planning phase, keeping you calm when things are going south or reminding you that it will all work out when your table linens arrive in the wrong color.
In honor of Mother’s Day, here are a few of my favorite ways to ensure your mom feels extra special when your big day arrives.
1. Let Your Mom Wear What She Wants
This sort of goes along with my general philosophy that you should never make your best friends (aka bridesmaids) wear ugly dresses. Your mom is going to be having almost as long of a day as you will on your wedding day, so make sure she feels comfortable and herself in whatever she wears!
My mom and I went shopping for her mother-of-the-bride dress together and after trying on tons of dresses, we finally found THE ONE – but almost immediately my mom was worried that the dress was too close to the color white and people would think it was rude of her to wear it.
I told her that I knew the dress wasn’t white, and that she loved how she looked and felt in it, and that was all that mattered! It was truly the most beautiful dress and I knew my mom felt like a million bucks in it, so why should a tiny detail like the shade of gold matter?
Maybe you have an idea of what you want your mom to wear, but remember that she should feel amazing – just like you do in your wedding dress – so she can fully enjoy every part of your big day.
2. Small Details Add Up
I really wanted to make sure our wedding reflected our relationship and our families throughout the details, and make sure my mom felt represented in those details were important too.
From having my mom get ready with me and my bridesmaids all morning, to displaying family photos of my mom and her mother on their wedding days, I wanted to make sure she felt included in all aspects.
I’ve always loved the tradition of “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue,” and I truly got to include some amazing pieces of my mother in my “something blue” and “something old.”
First, I worn a pair of blue topaz and diamond earrings that my father had bought my mother in Brazil when I was born. This was one of the first pieces of jewelry I had decided on after buying my dress and it felt so special to wear those on my big day knowing what a special place they had in my family.
I also worn my mother’s veil, which was really special to have on my wedding day. This veil was actually my aunt’s, who passed it on to my mother, and I felt very lucky that it was still in pristine condition for me to wear (after a view alterations!). The lace on the veil almost matched the lace on my dress perfectly, which I think was a sign that it was just meant to be.
3. Don’t Forget to Say Goodbye
My parents pulled the ultimate surprise at our wedding and hired a car and driver to take Chase and I to our after-party once our reception ended. Both my mom and dad were waiting outside the car once we got through our sparkler exit and even through all the chaos and excitement, I’ll never forget hugging my mom before I got into the car.
Even though I was going to see her at the hotel in just a few minutes, it felt important to hug her one more time before our magical night ended. She had worked so hard during our engagement – mostly keeping me from having a nervous breakdown – and had been there for me through every up and down of the planning process.
While it’s easy to finish your night on Cloud 9 with your spouse only thinking about your honeymoon or the exciting future ahead, don’t forget to give your mom (and dad!) one last hug goodnight and say thank you again for everything they did for you both.
4. Extra Bonus: Mother-Daughter Dance
If you’re looking for a super extra tear-jerker at your wedding, I highly recommend stealing this idea from my sister-in-law.
After her father-daughter dance, my SIL surprised my mother-in-law with their own special dance to their favorite song, “What a Wonderful World.”
Once my mother-in-law figured out what was happening, she broke down in tears, as did the rest of the room. It was the sweetest wedding moment I think I’ll ever see and not a single person in the room had a dry eye after that.
Similar to how my husband surprised his grandma with their own special dance, even just a tiny gesture like this can make a huge impact on your big day and the important people there celebrating with you.
I’m so lucky to have two amazing women I get to call my mothers, and I’m so glad my husband and I took the time to make them both an important part of our wedding day.